pls

roboboners:

jayda95:

all-because-we-fell-in-love:

floozys:

vagina’s are able to stretch wide enough to give birth to a fucking baby and then return to it’s original size but of course being penetrated by that grass blade you call a penis is what’s going to make it “loose”

Uhh. The baby doesnt come out of where the penis goes in…

stay in school y’all

i hate to be the bearer of bad news but the vagina and the vagina are, in fact, the same thing

celestia:

once i had a dream that my cat was working at mcdonalds w/ me and she had a lil uniform and she kept getting fur in the fries and everyone was yelling at me and saying “ur cat sucks on fries” and i was like “shes just a cat give her a break!” and i woke up crying

nonjutsu:

*In a Job Interview*

Interviewer: so tell me, why should we hire yo—

Me:

image

Interviewer: …I…I don’t see how that is supposed to hel—

me: 

image

Interviewer: i-if you could please stop doing t-tha—

me: 

image

Interviewer: SHIT BOI YOU GOT THE JOB GATDAM!!1!

hhantu:

franfrancatman:

My dad and I made this fishtank for my mum for Christmas a few years ago with dollhouse furniture. I thought it was pretty rad

i cant believe your mom is a fish

vzxy:

Quite possible the greatest tweet ever written. 

vzxy:

Quite possible the greatest tweet ever written. 

tylerfuckingromero:

same
did-you-kno:

In 1871, a defense attorney accidentally shot himself in the stomach while reenacting a barroom brawl in order to prove the innocence of his client. While demonstrating how the victim was shot by his own pistol, the gun went off and the attorney suffered the same fate. He died from his bullet wound, but he still won the case.
Source

did-you-kno:

In 1871, a defense attorney accidentally shot himself in the stomach while reenacting a barroom brawl in order to prove the innocence of his client. While demonstrating how the victim was shot by his own pistol, the gun went off and the attorney suffered the same fate. He died from his bullet wound, but he still won the case.

Source

megachikorita:

some kid in my class wrote an essay about how it never explicitly says Beowulf isn’t a robot

walkerflexxasranger:

"put ya tiddy in this ginger ale so i can take this picture…"

walkerflexxasranger:

"put ya tiddy in this ginger ale so i can take this picture…"

meatbicyclevevo:

suctioning:

weedjoke420:

can sad frog fix this economy?

image

what the fuck

globbyanimetears:

I wanted to do an anime redraw